June 23, 2012

Get off my lawn

I was all prepped to work on Tonight, but JFC:

Yesterday evening some hooligans were throwing rocks and stuff at my house and my neighbours called the cops. I didn't hear any strong impact or the likes, so chances are whatever they were chucking weren't sizable, but the nice old lady next door almost got hit, and I'm ticked off.

After a night of rest and reflection I went searching for peaceful solutions, since I was brought up by Asian grandparents and had I done the same, their solution would've been to smash my arms to pieces, and thus render me incapable of throwing anything at any other thing ever again because DISHONOUR! Which is overkill.

I didn't think my search would yield results, but apparently I have too much faith in humanity. 'Lo and behold, idiots are everywhere. There are stories of teens on bridges dropping cinder blocks on cars.


There are also people on forums excusing that sort of thuggish behaviour with stuff that loosely paraphrases as "kids will be kids".

WHAT. (Please don't reproduce.) I will not stand for your insult to children everywhere.

Some write it off with lame excuses like how it's one of those phases everyone goes through. I beg you not to group me with lowlifes 'kthanxbai.

In one of those instances a passing driver in an RAV4 snapped, pulled over, and shot the dummy with a crossbow. In another, this gang of brats was harrassing a senior in her sixties, setting her garbage on fire, breaking her windows and other repeated acts of vandalism. The lady finally got fed up and gunned them down.

Both cases ended without casualties, but some morons are less fortunate than others, and those incidents sparked heated debates, the gist of which goes:

Property can be easily replaced. A life cannot be. 

So true. And that's why you don't risk your life by destroying someone else's property. 

ROFL. I'm torn.

As funny and cathartic as the news and the discussion surrounding it are, I treasure my potted plants too much to resort to measures like dropping them on my trespassers' heads from the second floor, assuming they carry anything on those shoulders of theirs. No, really, they look my age. Judging. щ(ಠ益ಠщ) My peers disappoint me.

Dear douchebags, get off my lawn. YOLO, shop downtown, volunteer abroad, read books at the public library, go to a museum, see a therapist. My home is not your playground. You are free to hurl projectiles so long as you aim at each other. If not then keep your thrice-damned hands in your thrice-damned pants. Why must you not only deface my property but also subject me to the sight of those pants? Why? Go away and stay away.

In the meantime, I chill in my yard and eat watermelons.


  1. D:<

    Kids these days are so disrespectful. DISHONOR THEIR FAMRY TO SHAME. Like, allow me to rage with thee.


      You can tell I'm watching A:TLA again. XD

  2. When I first moved into my basement flat right in the middle of a big city, right next to hundreds of bars... I was pretty sure that surely some idiots would pee into my windows if I leave it open at night or throw some trash in or something.

    After one year I can say, there doesn't seem to be any idiot pranksters around here. Besides the occasional knocking on my window and running away every now and then nothing has happened so far.. that has restored my faith in humanity a little... 8)

    It's sad that there's idiots like the ones you encountered out there tho. :(

    1. The first month must've been nerve-wracking! It's great that no troublemakers have cropped up in your area. I'm glad.

      I YouTube'd the zombie song. It's really cute! The video had me in stitches. There's a zombie on your lawn~♪ Sunshine, teach me how to count like that.

    2. The game is pretty awesome and cute as well, you should give it a try if you ever get the chance. :)

  3. And for some reason I know have the "zombies on my lawn" song from Plants vs Zombies stuck in my head now... XD

  4. This is S-Neo by the way :]

    That is ridiculous, and the fact that people under the age of 18 can get a plea bargain for criminal activity makes me itch. I mean, some kids are really evil-like-they need to be in Jail with all the other thugs and pranksters that think that violent sht is funny.

    There was a time in middle school where I lived in Military housing, and three kids were lighting things on fire a few doors down from our house, and my mom was the only parent who got up and told them 'I don't know if your parents let you do this kind of stuff, but if you wanna set something on fire, do it by your house-that way-IF you set your house on fire, the fire truck will be here before it spreads to our house.'

    Like...for realz <.<. I would like to say that words are power, but with half the idiots in my age group who can half-way speak their own language, don't know enough to understand the impact of said words.


    Maybe it's time to invest in snipper bb guns >.> (grrr)

    1. S-Neo! (((@°▽°@)八(@°▽°@)))

      Do you blog? I want to follow you!

      Hmm, I'm more for community service and counselling, 'cos when you punish someone it only shows them what not to do, not what TO do. Or sumfink.

      UWAHAHA! Oh god my spleen! Oh I can't stop laughing. Your mom is a BAMF!

      BB gun? No, thank you, I'm accident-prone. Back in middle school a friend of mine sat me down for a third-person shooter, and the first thing we discovered was what happens when the avatar commits suicide.